Fun With Food
Food stories #1, #2, #3. But in no particular order.
(p.s. In title case, AP Stylebook caps prepositions of four or more letters, so “With” it is.)
#1.
omg that one time I had Thanksgiving with my mom when she was in an assisted living facility. They had nothing, I mean nothing, on the menu without meat in it.
Except they figured this sweet potato casserole maybe didn’t?
“Do y’all have any peanut butter?” No.
“Cottage cheese?” Not today.
“I guess tofu is out, huh.” Do what now?
#2.
There I was, minding my own business, whirring up a pink & green juice, when I hip-checked the dishwasher to close it shut.
Due to butt force trauma, half a can of beets exploded on the floor and took a fork and empty water bottle with it. Apparently the can was sitting too close to the edge of the counter.
CSI-worthy spatter pattern. I was Clorox wiping for days.
The splatter was everywhere. Here a spot, there a splotch, everywhere a splat-splot.
Fortunately, I was wearing black pants. Or were they…?
#3.
Let’s talk apples and oranges. A corer will work for both of them, yes?
NO. Again I say, noooooooooo.
No, an apple corer doesn’t work on oranges. It was a great idea, though!